Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Let me go...
I was moving on, feeling much better and making good progress on my goals. I was enjoying the sunrise almost every day and smiling more often. Now she is contacting me and is apparently coming home for a few months. I really don't want her in my life. Perhaps that is harsh, but my friend is gone and has been replaced by this person I don't know and don't really like. We were so close when she left, best friends. We talked openly and honestly. This new person has some of her attributes, but our conversation is awkward, shallow and without feeling or emotion. She gets angry quickly and is very condescending. I miss my friend and talking to this person brings me to a place where I don't want to be. I have not been very responsive to her. Perhaps she will lose interest and move on.
Monday, February 18, 2013
She's Baaaaackkkkk....
It's a cold day in the town square with a NW wind blowing at 20 - 25 knots. We received 4 - 5 inches of snow over the weekend and the DPW crews are still plowing and salting.
The past few weeks I have been upbeat and productive. I am working through my financial issues and as time passed, became less and less anxious about A's absence. I have made many new friends in the creative community and I'm feeling successful on the Maslovian scale.
Last night A managed to get her phone and she resumed texting me. While I enjoy hearing from her, I really am not very interested in listening to how horrible everything is and how she is depressed and hates being there. I am in a quandary as to what to do moving forward. I want to support her and be her friend, but I am not anxious to become emotionally attached to her again. She chose a path, against my advice, which will almost certainly guarantee her 4 - 8 years of very difficult times. There is little I can do except listen; I just don't know if I am up for that. For now, I will simply not be super responsive. Perhaps I will start having phone issues. I don't want to hurt her, but I need to keep myself in a good space. Idk... It's hard to let go.
The past few weeks I have been upbeat and productive. I am working through my financial issues and as time passed, became less and less anxious about A's absence. I have made many new friends in the creative community and I'm feeling successful on the Maslovian scale.
Last night A managed to get her phone and she resumed texting me. While I enjoy hearing from her, I really am not very interested in listening to how horrible everything is and how she is depressed and hates being there. I am in a quandary as to what to do moving forward. I want to support her and be her friend, but I am not anxious to become emotionally attached to her again. She chose a path, against my advice, which will almost certainly guarantee her 4 - 8 years of very difficult times. There is little I can do except listen; I just don't know if I am up for that. For now, I will simply not be super responsive. Perhaps I will start having phone issues. I don't want to hurt her, but I need to keep myself in a good space. Idk... It's hard to let go.
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