Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Just looking...

Following is a conversation with myself while I was running on the treadmill at the gym -

Ok, focus here.  Clear your mind.  Smooth out your gait.  Quiet feet. Nice even stride.

Oh damn, that is a nice ass! 

What the fuck are you doing? 

Think of it as art.

Art?

Art

How about if you think of "it" as a woman?

It's not like I am going to fuck her.  And look at the way she is dressed.  She would be disappointed if guys didn't look at her.

What if she was not attractive?

Then I wouldn't look

So your shallow


Perhaps.  Or maybe I am just admiring ONE of the many fine attributes of a woman

What if these woman could read your mind and knew what your thinking?

I am ok with that.  I am not being disrespectful.  I am simply admiring the results of a lot of hard work and sacrifice.

This is not who you are

(Silence)

How you feel about yourself is a result of how you conduct yourself and your ability to live a life that reflects your values

I don't choose the woman whom I associate with based on their looks.

Bullshit!

Ok, maybe a little.  But aren't we talking about primeval instincts that I have limited control over?  Isn't it really about propagation of the species?

So you do want to fuck her

No, well yeah, but no...  I love my wife.   I accept monogamy.  It is just exciting to look.  It generates mood chemicals like endorphins and epinephrine.

God wouldn't like it

God created it!  Should I not admire his work?

Your not admiring, your leering.  It is just a whisper away from touching.

(Silence)

The question you have to ask yourself is this -  If there is nothing wrong with what you are doing, then why does it bother you so much?

(Silence)

2 comments:

Fish said...

You feel guilty about it because American society has told you to.

In all actuality, looking, touching, and fucking the woman isn't really a crime.

zirelda said...

Oh ow.

Moral conversations with the self can be difficult.

From my point of view, both sides are correct.