Always a father

Conversation from two weeks ago - "J, we need to talk about  your community service" I  said as I drove J to work."What about  it" he replied in a defensive tone.  "You have not done any community service in a year" I continued.  "I am not going to stand by and watch you end up in jail because you can't get your community service done.  You have two weeks to find something on your own or I will start driving you to the shelter after work two days a week.  If you don't start your community service then you will have to move out.  I stood by once before and let you make this incredibly bad decision and I am not going to do it again."  "Whatever Dad" he replied staring out the side window.

Conversation from last week - "Just a reminder J, next week you need to start your community service.  If you don't line something up on your own, I will take you to the shelter two days a week after work".  "Whatever Dad" he replied staring out the side window.  "I am not going to accept any excuses either" I continued.  "I I don't want to hear you can't do it because you have something else more important.  I am dead serious about this and I hope you are taking me seriously" I said.  He just stared out the window and said nothing more.


Conversation from this morning - "So I will pick you up at 3:30 today?" I asked J as I drove him to work.  "For what" he replied.  "For community service" I said.  "I am not going.  I have a meeting with H R Block at 4:00" he retorted.  "J, I told you that I was not going to except any excuses.  Either you go or you will have to move out of the house".  "Then  I will move out" he said with a sullen look on his face.  I  could  feel the anger swelling up inside me and it took every ounce of energy to keep it together.  "J, if you do this, you will seriously damage our relationship" I said.  "Your telling me this as I DRIVE YOU TO WORK?" I added my voice raising in volume.  My fingers began to turn white as I clenched the steering wheel.  "So our relationship means so little to you that you would put this ahead of us? I asked.  He just sat there, saying nothing.  "J, I hope I get a call from you today telling me you changed your mind" I said as he got out of the truck.

Fuck me...