I WANT to be in Clickerville...apparently. Today I watched five hours of the show Axe Men and a couple of movies. Axe Men is a reality show about loggers working in the Northwest. Last night a watched three movies including Poison Ivy with Drew Barrymore, Sara Gilbert and Tom Skerrit. My shrink wants me to keep track of what I watch so we can discusss what shows and movies I enjoy. He thinks this may help me to figure out how to find joy in my life again. I think it will just take the right fucking drug which is apparently not Lexapro.
I am setting a horrible example for my son... I feel like a fucking loser...
I used to WANT to go to work, do chores at home, spend time with my family and countless other things instead of watching TV. I want to change what I want. I should not want to waste my life away in Clickerville.
On the flip side, I had another meeting with the home for adolescent kids today and I will finally start working with the kids next Friday. I am excited about this opportunity and I hope it helps me find some motivation in my life. And, I made my way to work and I am at least earning some money. Although, I am watching Last Tango in Paris while I rebuild some computers.
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2 comments:
You will find your motivation again, it will sneak up when you least expect it.
Hey I'm 35 and still feel 17 so it might not wear off for a while! Sounds like you're at a crossroads but you don't really know it. I'm probably there too if I'm honest. We just moved house and threw the TV out to try and fix that problem. Now I hate what I want even more though! Life talks back to us all the time I reckon. Good luck listening in 2009.
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