Moving on

The envelope sits on the front seat of my car. The memo inside reads "Effective immediately, please terminate my membership in the Young Marines". My stomach is in knots and my heart is racing. I had planned to place this envelope in the CO's mailbox, but after further consideration, decided to give it to him in person. My decision to leave the program is based on my inability to tolerate the stress and anxiety resulting from the CO's narcissistic, hypocritical, erratic and unpredictable behavior. Recently I had resigned as the XO and taken responsibility for recruit training hoping to stay with the unit while decreasing my interaction with the CO. A few weeks later, the CO is making significant decisions relative to recruit training without consulting me or the kids running the recruit training classes. This is after telling me that recruit training would be my command and he would not interfere in it. Making matters worse, these decisions directly violate unit policies implemented by the CO; another example of his hypocritical behavior.

My work with the kids meant so much to me; I am very angry and frustrated that I cannot do what I love due to one individual who is a complete and utter ass. I have thoughts of violence towards him that sometimes scare me. I will be joining another martial arts program and every bag, pad and opponent I face will represent this person who I used to call a friend.

B says he wants to stay with the program but I expect the CO will ultimately force him out. I feel like I let B down but I just cannot handle the stress and anxiety any longer. Saturday I purchased a second racing bicycle and I am hopeful that B will come to enjoy riding as much as I do.